Weight Issues

Hmm ... big topic. Where do I start?

Traditionally, I like to weigh in at about 58kg. 57kg is better, but I find that somewhat hard to maintain. So 58kg it is. That makes me feel like Elle. Macpherson. Like I could just fly into Paris and walk down the cat walk. It's uber cool.

When my cancer diagnosis was confirmed I weighed in at 61kg. I wasn't happy about that weight. Losing those extra kilos had been on my agenda since giving birth to Sabina. Alas. Then I put myself on a diet - not to lose weight, just to get healthy. To lose the cancer. And amazingly, without starving myself, without denying myself anything, I lost the despicable kilos. So, I was back to Elle Macpherson ... just with cancer.

Like a model, strutting down the catwalk, I strolled into my naturopath's office. "And amongst other things, I want you to put on some weight", he concluded the one hour consultation. "I need you to put on about 3 or 4 kilos." My jaw dropped. No way! I've worked so hard to feel like Elle, and now he wants me to feel like ... well ... not sure what yet. "The weight you put on, it must be muscle", continued the good doctor, totally unaware of the battle going on in my mind. "You don't need more fat, but you do need more muscle."

When I walked out of his office I was at odds. I mean, if more muscle meant no cancer, then I was willing to do it. But, oh, to let go of feeling like Elle? Then came my chemo treatments, and the survival instinct kicked in. I had to eat to feel better, and raw veggies just weren't going to cut it. So I had a choice - carbs or protein. I followed my naturopath's advice and got stuck into the protein.

Currently I weigh in at about 61.5kg. I don't feel like Elle any more. No, more like Stephanie Rice. Can't quite cut the lean catwalk figure, but I can put some power into my life, before I do that well angled photo shoot. Yes, it appears that I have put on muscle - just like the good doctor ordered. I feel it. I feel strong, I feel powerful, I feel good. (Post chemo side effects excepted).

Come to think of it, maybe I just feel like me?